I've come to a point in my life where I am truly content with who I am...and it feels really good.

I did a lot of snowboarding this season, but didn't end up buying a board. It's probably best that I didn't. I'm not half bad and look forward to next season - I'll probably buy a board so I don't have to rent anymore. I've started going to yoga once a week. I really enjoy it and hope to start practicing at home - I have a mat, but no room. When I move maybe I'll have more personal space...then I wouldn't feel self-conscious about it.

We're in the last week of classes, finally. Most of this quarter has been pretty dull, but now that things have picked up I'm being much more productive. It works best for me when everything happens at once. I have a terrible tendency to slack off if I can, but when I have a lot going on I'm good at getting things done. One class is already finished up - except for an exam. I have 3 final exams total, but they shouldn't be too rough.

I finally got a response to one of my numerous job applications! We set up an interview for June 7. The company sounds amazing, and I would absolutely love to be offered the position. *Fingers crossed* It's in Everett, WA which is perfect; away from the city yet close enough for a quick trip.

Hopefully things fall into place. I'll need to find a place to live by August and would prefer to know where I'll be working. I'm looking forward to summer. I'll be taking one class on Wednesday evenings and also continue my research job. Potentially (hopefully!) I will be working 40hrs/week at a new job too :) It may be a little busy...

...but, that is how I like it best.

I'll skip the typical intro since it seems to be "a while since I wrote last" fairly often.

I've finally settled into Seattle and it's grown on me. School is fine...it's actually really easy. I didn't think that grad school was supposed to be so easy. It's almost a joke, but hey I'll have my Master's degree and hopefully get a job without too much hassle, yay me. I have one quarter left until I can graduate, and then I can stay with it through the summer if finding a job proves to be difficult. After that things may get bad if I am unable to find work. I'm hoping to stay in Seattle no matter what, but either way I'm going to do what I have to and what's ultimately best for me.

I still miss Houghton and all of the good times I had there. I think about it more often than I should, but that's only because it has been so difficult to connect with people here. The relationships I have with everyone here are very...not superficial I believe they are genuine interactions, but they are on-the-surface. I haven't really found friends to connect with and the ones I do have I don't get to see very often. They work and have their own things going on so it makes it difficult to really get to know them too. But, I am beginning to connect with them even through our sparse get-togethers.

I'm still living life the way I want and doing things that I set my mind to. I read a quote the other day in a small book that read something like, what was the last first thing you've done? And proudly for me, I have had quite a few and I'm pretty sure that's a good thing. I've built my own computer (with some much appreciated help), I've started learning how to snowboard, I ate sushi (the raw fish kind) even though I was scared for my life due to my shellfish allergy. Needless to say, it was prepared well and didn't cause an allergic reaction. I did have my epi-pen on me though, just in case.

I recently took a mini-vacation to Leavenworth, WA....by myself. I wanted to go snowboarding and stay out there to check out the town because I had never been. It was overnight on a Monday so I found a hotel room for $60; they upgraded me to a suite since it was so dead, being March not much happens in that town during this time of year. I've gotten very good at being alone, doing things by myself - doing what I want, when I want, with whomever I want and not having to explain or worry about anyone else's thoughts about it. It's great!

....except...

I'm getting really scared that I won't be able to return to being the socialite I used to be. I can already tell I'm out of practice, even in plain interactions/conversations with people. I'm much more reserved than I used to be, I don't contribute much to conversation, I don't like being in a herd of people all doing the same thing for the sake of conformity. I know there are ways I could become more social, but I don't have the desire to go out and meet other new people and go through the awkward - do we click? could we be good friends? do we have enough common interests? - it really makes me miss Tech and how easy it was to connect with some of the people I did.

This is really quite depressing to think about.

I am currently looking for a guy to spend my time with. That would be nice to have at least. I'm over the idea of no strings attached and fwb. I'm ready for something more, something better...I want something different, I need something more, I deserve something better. I've even tried online dating through okcupid. Went on a couple of dates with a guy just to give him a chance and quickly figured out we had NO chemistry and I wasn't really into him. After foreseeing the possibility of having many of those awkward 1st & 2nd dates only to decide it wasn't right, I didn't want to put myself through that non-sense. I really want it to happen, but naturally, spontaneously, or through a friend...in person at least. I find reading through craigslist ads is entertaining, but sometimes all too tempting. There's not much information but sometimes I can't help but wonder. Previously I have met up with someone through the platonic section to see the symphony, and that turned out ok...but I'm pretty sure it's still a little too scary to pursue as an option. It's probably best to stay anonymous on CL.

I can't believe how quickly time really goes. But I guess you just have to take life one day at a time and make what you want out of it. That mentality has treated me pretty well thus far in life. I'm grateful for the experiences I've had and the lessons learned, but it'd be nice to find someone to be happy with rather than just happy by myself.